Me
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Restless
I must say the break from treatment has been such a blessing....I am loving the opportunity to focus and have some energy! Unfortunately, quite a bit of my energy is being spent on focusing on my surgery. 5 days away from today.....the day after my birthday. Don't get me wrong.....I don't want to focus on that - it just seems to be what's on my mind........ALL THE TIME! I am not so worried about the outcome or results......I know I can fight through anything! I think it's more about the surgery itself and the recovery. Not being in control, totally dependent on someone I just met and putting my life in his hands. Trusting him.......
Monday, March 21, 2011
Updates
Update from morning appt. Looks like surgery on the 31st to extract 2
of the 17 known nodules (there was only 5 last year) through open lung
biopsy. Will be In the hospital for 3 days. 2 weeks recovery. Update
from morning appt. Looks like surgery on the 31st to extract 2 of the
17 known nodules (there was only 5 last year) through open lung
biopsy. Will be In the hospital for 3 days. 2 weeks recovery.
Update from today's ultrasound and mammogram to address the enlarged
lymph nodes and they were too far back in my chest wall to see but
they did find an area present only on my right side that gained
suspicion to the radiologist. He is going to talk to my oncologist and
lung surgeon and recommend a biopsy of that as well. We are waiting
for blood test results to see if my white blood count is high enough
to endure the lung surgery safely.
Blood test is back! First time since July 1, 2010 that my WBC & RBC were in a normal range! Well there's some good news! So for surgery,I have the choice of either this Thursday (3 days from now) or next Thursday - 10 days.....I am choosing March 31st.
Update on me......I am feeling great physically! 3 weeks with no treatment has allowed me to have energy, spunk and has really given me a glimpse of how I will feel after it is all over. Emotionally - I am not sure how I am......I am scared........but I know that whatever this is - I will survive - I am a fighter - I will be strong and as Sugarland would say "It'll be alright again"
Thank you all for your love and your support.......it's what gets me through this!
you would think that taking a break from treatment would slow down the hair loss process.....NOPE!
of the 17 known nodules (there was only 5 last year) through open lung
biopsy. Will be In the hospital for 3 days. 2 weeks recovery. Update
from morning appt. Looks like surgery on the 31st to extract 2 of the
17 known nodules (there was only 5 last year) through open lung
biopsy. Will be In the hospital for 3 days. 2 weeks recovery.
Update from today's ultrasound and mammogram to address the enlarged
lymph nodes and they were too far back in my chest wall to see but
they did find an area present only on my right side that gained
suspicion to the radiologist. He is going to talk to my oncologist and
lung surgeon and recommend a biopsy of that as well. We are waiting
for blood test results to see if my white blood count is high enough
to endure the lung surgery safely.
Blood test is back! First time since July 1, 2010 that my WBC & RBC were in a normal range! Well there's some good news! So for surgery,I have the choice of either this Thursday (3 days from now) or next Thursday - 10 days.....I am choosing March 31st.
Update on me......I am feeling great physically! 3 weeks with no treatment has allowed me to have energy, spunk and has really given me a glimpse of how I will feel after it is all over. Emotionally - I am not sure how I am......I am scared........but I know that whatever this is - I will survive - I am a fighter - I will be strong and as Sugarland would say "It'll be alright again"
Thank you all for your love and your support.......it's what gets me through this!
you would think that taking a break from treatment would slow down the hair loss process.....NOPE!
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
The results
Yesterday's visit with my oncologist brought good news and some concerns.....
He read me the results....they went something like this......
"They saw limited activity in your Right Mammory Lymph Node and in some other areas under your right implant on the PET Scan. And there were no changes in the nodes in your lungs, I don't think you have Cancer - But.....I have been wrong before. So we are going to have you get an ultrasound mammogram and then take another look in 3 months..."
I responded with....."I'm confused! What happened to the Mammory Lymph Node on the LEFT? The one that was enlarged and noted on the CT Scan?"
He looked at both reports and turned to me and said....."your right!"
And then I said...."The CT Scan stated that the Nodules had multiplied and grown in size and the PET Scan says there is no change? Which test do we trust?"
He looked again and compared the results again and said "You are right!"
So here we are sitting there staring at each other................crazy silence!
He said...."OK...I will get with BOTH of these radiologists together a figure this out...." In the meantime we need to get your ultrasound done and get you scheduled for an open lung biopsy. If these nodules are multiplying and getting larger we need to see what they are and the best way to do that is to take a bit out of one."
I completely agreed.......then I came home and looked up "Open Lung Biopsy" and thought.....Oh my!!! What have I signed up for? I thought they would just do like a liver biopsy - needle aspiration. Nope.....not the case!
Even though there are more test, more waiting for results, hoping they are right....I am still able to take a break from my treatments, well most of them. I still have to take the Nupogen Treatment because even though I have been off ALL treatment for more than two weeks - my WBC are still at 1.7 (normal is 4) All other blood test levels are moving closer to normal......physically I feel GREAT!
Doing the best to keep good thoughts and a motivated attitude!
He read me the results....they went something like this......
"They saw limited activity in your Right Mammory Lymph Node and in some other areas under your right implant on the PET Scan. And there were no changes in the nodes in your lungs, I don't think you have Cancer - But.....I have been wrong before. So we are going to have you get an ultrasound mammogram and then take another look in 3 months..."
I responded with....."I'm confused! What happened to the Mammory Lymph Node on the LEFT? The one that was enlarged and noted on the CT Scan?"
He looked at both reports and turned to me and said....."your right!"
And then I said...."The CT Scan stated that the Nodules had multiplied and grown in size and the PET Scan says there is no change? Which test do we trust?"
He looked again and compared the results again and said "You are right!"
So here we are sitting there staring at each other................crazy silence!
He said...."OK...I will get with BOTH of these radiologists together a figure this out...." In the meantime we need to get your ultrasound done and get you scheduled for an open lung biopsy. If these nodules are multiplying and getting larger we need to see what they are and the best way to do that is to take a bit out of one."
I completely agreed.......then I came home and looked up "Open Lung Biopsy" and thought.....Oh my!!! What have I signed up for? I thought they would just do like a liver biopsy - needle aspiration. Nope.....not the case!
Even though there are more test, more waiting for results, hoping they are right....I am still able to take a break from my treatments, well most of them. I still have to take the Nupogen Treatment because even though I have been off ALL treatment for more than two weeks - my WBC are still at 1.7 (normal is 4) All other blood test levels are moving closer to normal......physically I feel GREAT!
Doing the best to keep good thoughts and a motivated attitude!
Monday, March 14, 2011
Today is the day!
Most of my days go by pretty quickly....You know that old saying...."there's not enough hours in the day"? Well, I must say today has WAY TOO MANY! Had to take a sleeping pill last night to even get to sleep.....then I still woke earlier that I wanted too. I was then able to get skyped into the meeting in Peurto Vallarta (you know the trip I was unable to attend) which made time fly by a little faster. Now it is just a waiting game! I get to hear from my oncologist if my whole world is turned upside down or not. As if it isn't already......
Days like today, the days that give you time to do nothing but think, make you so greatful for the things you have.....make you realize what is important in life and that if you want something out of "life" you need to go out and get it! Because who knows how long your going to be here and/or in what condition you will be in. Another mountain...............
Days like today, the days that give you time to do nothing but think, make you so greatful for the things you have.....make you realize what is important in life and that if you want something out of "life" you need to go out and get it! Because who knows how long your going to be here and/or in what condition you will be in. Another mountain...............
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
The waiting game....
This past week has been a wonderful break from all meds. My doctor took me off everything until I am able to find out about findings from the CT scan from the oncologist. I told my husband "If this week is a prelude to how I am going to feel after my treatment is over - it will have been so worth it!" I have felt physically great - emotionally, well, that's another story. Waiting to see some one to find out if you have cancer....waiting to see when you have to go back on the poison that is supposed to cure you....hoping that your time off treatment doesn't hinder your progress....is it a reacurrance of my breast cancer from 20 years ago (I guess it can lay dormant for 30+yrs.).....is it a new cancer....what's going to happen....
Finally got into the oncologist yesterday to further evaluate the lymph nodes and nodules. I was really impressed with his demeanor and passion for results. My husband was impressed as well, he says I am good hands! After talking with the doctor and an exam, he decided to have me go in for a PET scan. He is concerned and promised me that we will find the answer to what this is. He also assured me that if it a metastasize cancer, it is most likely in the early stages and will be treatable. Today they will let me know when I go in for the PET scan - then 2 days later I will get the results.
GOD made me a strong woman. He grants me the serenity to accept the thing I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference....
but patience...........well, that's another story..........please keep me in your prayers - I believe they are working :)
Finally got into the oncologist yesterday to further evaluate the lymph nodes and nodules. I was really impressed with his demeanor and passion for results. My husband was impressed as well, he says I am good hands! After talking with the doctor and an exam, he decided to have me go in for a PET scan. He is concerned and promised me that we will find the answer to what this is. He also assured me that if it a metastasize cancer, it is most likely in the early stages and will be treatable. Today they will let me know when I go in for the PET scan - then 2 days later I will get the results.
GOD made me a strong woman. He grants me the serenity to accept the thing I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference....
but patience...........well, that's another story..........please keep me in your prayers - I believe they are working :)
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